May 4th 2023 - Introduction

May 4th, 2023

So, I've decided to try my hand at blogging!  I have a lot to say, so I'll be keeping it in pieces for now due to time constraints and also to not put you to sleep!  As you should know by now, I was raised as a Jehovah's Witness.  My mother's family had followed since the days of Rutherford.  My great grandmother always showed me the convention pamphlet she held so dear and was sure to name drop Joseph (Judge) Rutherford's name since he was the keynote speaker. 

It was a trying time as many of you can probably relate when referring to the life we all must live as young JWs.  My father was an elder for many years and was quite abusive, especially towards my brother.  It was an unhappy family life to say the least!  As a result, both me and my brother married early in an effort to get out of the house - my brother at 17 and me at 18.  

This brings me to the situation where I am at now.  Let's call my husband "John".  If I told you his real name, he'd be easy to locate because of the uniqueness of his name.  John's family is wealthy, and his father was and is a powerful elder who owns a general contracting business.  You can hardly throw a stone in the town I live in without hitting one of the homes he built.  John was his apprentice and has taken on his father's many "qualities".  But let me tell you something about John.  He wanted to marry a sister in our congregation who was "spiritually weak".  By that I mean she was known to date men and was easy to seduce.  Let's call her "Chloe".  John loved her and still does.  But his father wouldn't hear of it, so he pushed John to marry the next best thing - me.  At first, I was impressed by his family's wealth and stature within the congregation so let's be clear that I married him enthusiastically and the first few months were genuinely joyful.  My father-in-law paid for a 3-week honeymoon in the Seychelles which I still have fond memories of.

John was always explaining that he had to stay out late at night due to his demanding job.  I found out later that it was a cover story to see Chloe and carry on an extra-marital affair with her.  To be clear I have never caught them in the act, but as a wife would know, there were always tell-tale signs.  There were cars parked out late in front of her home, the smell of unfamiliar perfume and suspicious purchases which later meshed with what Chloe was wearing.  John also is a heavy drinker, probably due to the fact his father is and his long days at job sites.  

I got pregnant early on in the marriage and gave birth to my firstborn child 11 months after we were wed.  Something changed though.  Perhaps it was due to the change in both of our lives with an infant to care for.  Perhaps it was due to his growing relationship with Chloe.  Or perhaps John was and is an abusive man that explains why he started abusing me after our child was born.  At first it was a slap in the face and me being told off that I needed to respect him.  It eventually gravitated into full on fights where I was pulled by the hair and shoved against the wall.  After one such night, he finished it off with a full-on punch to my face.  Of course, I went to the hospital and lied to the police when they were called.  Jehovah's name couldn't be tarnished in any way.  We all met at my father in law's home to settle this and he settled it as he always does - by throwing money at the problem.  I got a nice Louis Vuitton bag out of it that cost thousands.  

I still have it.  But I paid for it in blood as far as I was concerned.

I will write more about John later, but this is about all the trauma I can take for one outing.  

Before I leave, I'll explain my current living situation.  Last October I got our two children and left for my parent's home.  It had gotten out of control.   My parents took me in, but always with the expectation I would be returning to John once things got settled, or more specifically, John's father spread his cash around so everyone would be more eager to forgive.

This time I would not forgive. By the time January rolled around, the pressure to reconcile with John was getting too much for me to handle.  So, I had taken money out of our joint account and placed the deposit down on a two-bedroom apartment where me and the girls can live.  Both John and my father-in-law were livid and cut me off on the spot.  I found a job where I am working at now at the hospital which pays me a fair wage and enough to cover our expenses.  

Neither John nor my parents are aware that I intend to not only make this a permanent split from John, but also from the Jehovah's Witnesses.  

I have had enough.  And I'm afraid that the real drama is about to begin.  

Talk to you soon, 

Madison.